I feel like hickies are something you either love or hate! I’ve gone through periods of time in my life where I loved and hated them. I often give them without even realizing it. 

I remember my first hickey, I saw it in the mirror the next morning and I was HORRIFIED! I tried to cover it up with makeup but that is no easy feat. I was heading out that day with my family so I threw on a hoodie and hoped for the best. 15 minutes later my mom found out. She embarrassed me and made me feel really self-conscious for the rest of the day. I hated it. I think there are a lot of people out there who feel ashamed about having a hickey. They are almost deemed dirty, slutty, and not something that people should have. But why? What makes a hickey so bad? Why can’t you walk around with a small mark on your body because you had sex recently?

womans shoulder with 3 large hickies

It isn’t until I got older that I realized I didn’t care if I had a hickey, and I wasn’t going to stop someone from giving me one. As much as I hate the public dictating how I live my life, I have limited neck hickies during periods where I have to work because it just makes my life easier. 

What Do I Love About Them

They are lasting reminders of the sex or make-out session you had previously. I am a huge memory keeper, I have boxes of ticket stubs, letters, and photos from the past years. I can’t get rid of them. Hickies are like those things for me. Long after my partner has left I have something to remind me of them. It is like when a dog pees on a tree, they are claiming their territory. That is what hickies are like for me. 

What I Hate About Them

I hate what society thinks of them. I hate that there are tutorials online showing you how to cover up a hickey as if you need to. Why can’t you just flaunt it? I just googled “Hickey” and the first posts to come up are, how to give a hickey, and the ones following are all about how to get rid of them or hide them! They even suggest rubbing a battery on it! I say that if you have a hickey, just deal with it. Don’t ever feel embarrassed by something that you liked or enjoyed. 

Should You Give Them?

Welcome to my typical answer for almost everything, TALK TO YOUR PARTNER! You will never know how people will feel about something without talking to them first. You never want to give your partner something that they don’t want. You might not know their situation or how they feel about things without speaking with them first. Being open and honest is the best way to do things, and it shows them that you care about their opinions.

Moral of The Story: Love really does bite.